Thougths on 9/11

I've been watching some of the coverage of 9/11 these past few days. It's almost as though it happened just yesterday.

I remember being at my job that day, like any other day, and how important my work seemed. Every piece of paper and every file on my computer. They all seemed vitally important.

Then the first plane hit the North Tower. And then the second hit the South Tower. I was stunned. I watched the towers as they collapsed and all those pieces of paper floated down to the street. I wondered whose piece of paper that was and how important it was to them, perhaps even as little as an hour before. I looked at my own desk and my own work and it all seemed so stupid. I felt disassociated with many of my co-workers who seemed to be continuing with their day as though these monumental tragedies were not occurring.

I still don't understand the meanness of the human race. So many of us are not the kind people we should be. Some of us don't even seem to try. Just the other day, if a friend and I hadn't stopped at a cross walk, two men in a pick-up truck would have gladly run us over. And probably smiled while doing it.

Now I go to work everyday and remain completely devoid of connection. I have not put up so much as one quote or photo on my desk. The upstairs departments rarely fraternize with the downstairs departments. And one side of "The Room can't even be civil to the other side of "The Room". Every day seems so stupid and pointless.

I continue to try to be the best person I can be, but unfortunately I often let myself down. I'm not even sure how to close this as it is unfathomable to me that we call ourselves civilized.